JOSÉ WEINSTEIN is the head-honcho and CEO of Tele-Visión. A self-proclaimed, non-practicing Jew, Jose Weinstein is in charge of keeping the ship afloat. The pros – Weinstein has a great, big heart. The cons – Weinstein’s heart is full of hate, racism, self-hate (different than regular hate), more racism, classism, sexism – and any other kind of ism that connotes a negative negativism.
LOU FRANCO – Jose Weinstein’s right-hand man – Programming VP for the network – believes that there’s hope for the company. Even though he works surrounded by chaos, he tries to do what’s best in most situations. Lou quietly ‘fixes’ a lot of the situations that otherwise would have turned to be devastating for the company. We see the behind the scenes of Tele-Visión’s story through Lou’s POV.
JAIMEE SMITH – is the femme inoffensive in charge of Human Resources and has one of the toughest (if not the absolute toughest) jobs at the network. She attempts to keep order in the day-to-day operations and safeguards against employees disobeying company policies and state laws. Of course, she’s unable to keep it together, and complaints and lawsuits constantly fly high and constant in the company. Jaimee’s biggest issue is that she’s a third-generation Latina that doesn’t speak Spanish – for this, she’s looked down on by her co-workers. Jaimee has a romantic thing for Lou and is very obvious.
FACUNDO MALVERDE – The ‘cleanup’ man – also known as the network’s attorney and head of legal and business affairs – he is the one that deals with the steadfast, multiple lawsuits and the occasional criminal charges that arise as the result of running such turbid operations.
JOE VALEMADRIS is an Argentinian sales guru – a blend of Joe Girard and Bernie Madoff – he creates magic when it comes to “creatively” finding willing advertisers and sponsors. Joe’s demographic charts are enchanting, and he’s able to easily spin bad ratings to his advantage.
SOCORRO DE LA CARIDAD (aka Hope) is Jose Weinstein’s assistant. She’s the one that keeps Weinstein’s life together – personal and business. i.e. Keeping him married, making sure his kids love him, etc. She goes beyond her line of duty and pay scale.
STROM THURMOND is majority shareholder of the Tele-Visión network; son of the Network’s original founder. Strom doesn’t know he’s a bigot, partly because his only focus is making money by all means necessary. His directives to the executives of the network are pretty much orders that must be carried out.
VIRGINIA SOTOMAYOR is the most powerful board member of the company, after Strom. Virginia is the network founder’s widow; Strom’s strict stepmother. Virginia keeps Strom from completely destroying the network her husband founded.
SAVANNAH LOQUENDO (aka Rainman) – In charge of research, focus groups, interpreting ratings etc. Savannah is brilliant, however, her brilliance comes out of her unfortunate Savant Syndrome. So in theory, all she’s able to do is analyze facts. Weinstein uses her condition to his advantage, turning apparent downfalls into opportunities.
RONALDO CRISTIANO is the incompetent head of marketing with the uncanny ability to make a bad show seem even worse. Ronaldo is in charge of putting together events and promotions for the network, in addition to updating the horrendously out-of-date website.
AMELIA VARGAS is Jose Weinstein’s Dominican dark-skinned cousin working as a production assistant (at the insistence of Weinstein’s mother). However, Amelia wants to make it big in front of the camera – a dream that Weinstein is against, since he doesn’t believe “dark-skinned” talent should be on air.
HECTOR CAMACHO is the Nuyorican sportscaster that doesn’t know much about any other sport, except baseball; however he thinks he knows it all. He was born and raised in the Bronx and barely speaks Spanish – his accent is broken and his speech is hardly understandable to the Spanish-language audience. Hector also thinks he’s God’s gift to women, therefore his eyebrows are always on fleek (ghetto translation: extreme eyebrow shaping).
SANCHO “EL BROCHAS” MARTINEZ is the network’s subpar make up artist – a true diva –feared at the network for his gossiping antics, and being a master drama-creator. El Brochas can take a simple comment or observation and exaggerate it into an all-out physical fight.
ENANITO RAMIREZ is the in-house Little Person. He’s a product of the best performing arts schools in Europe and came to the U.S. to pursue his acting career. Unfortunately, his chronic alcoholism and poor life choices led him to a gig at Tele-Visión where he’s demeaned and bullied.
LALO CAVERGA is the network’s transexual spiritual advisor. She [and sometimes “he” (when she gets “possessed” by spirits)] hosts a widely popular horoscope segment in the network. Lalo also helps Weinstein “do witchcraft” on his foes and competition, as well the occasional spiritual cleanse of the studios.
FEDERICO DELPICO is a Salvadorian reporter that gets sent to cover the most dangerous, unnecessary assignments. Miraculously, Delpico survives to tell the story every time – a story that later is edited and manipulated to take away any sign of respectability or meaning. Delpico is brilliant, but also looked down upon by Weinstein because of his Salvadorian decent.
ANASTASIA GUERRA is the network’s popular voluptuous “meteorologist”. She has a “10” body with a matching IQ score, and is wrong about her weather forecasts 90% of the time – however, her short shorts and tight dresses keeps the male audience interested in climate change.
MARGARITA INFANTE is the staple talent of Tele-Visión. She could be compared to a Diane Sawyer or a Katie Couric at the English-language networks. Margarita is trusted and respected by the audience and her programs are high-rated. Yet, she finds herself fighting to protect her professional integrity and constant attempts to taint her image with endless product integrations and ridiculous programming agendas.
GUATEMALAN CLEANING LADY – She’s the cleaning lady who knows the ins and outs of everyone in the network. She’s always eavesdropping in meetings and conversations and sometimes even adds her two-cents in order to resolve some of the network’s problems.
THE SECURITY GUARD – Big, muscular, African-American– doesn’t speak one lick of Spanish, but feels has a free pass to sexually harass female employees using broken-down Spanish-language one-liners. From time to time, Weinstein privately trusts him with personal and business issues. His advice is always some of the simplest, yet wisest ever.